about a burning fire

new journal :)

Thu, 11 Aug 2005 07:58:37 GMT

I Have A New Journal, Guys :)
obscure_heart
add me :)

<3 sara

a tribute to jimmy . . .

Wed, 10 Aug 2005 06:14:59 GMT

hi everyone* i*ve done absolutely nothing all day. well, i went to buy the STaiNd cd but that*s about it. oh & i also cleaned, and beat AJ at pool and fought with my friend but there*s no big suprise there.

so i cleaned out the jimmy today. he*s like the only thing that*s always been there for me, whenever i needed him. whether it be putting my life in danger because of malfunctioning wipers or listening to me cry when things weren*t going my way, he never let me down. i may sound stupid for being so sad about getting rid of him, but i*ve just been through a lot of shit with that damn car. lol i*ve had some real good times in it. like sneaking people in the back & leaving school. or that one time i drove with cj & david i laughed sooo much. then there was that time julian drove it and we shared a cigarette on the expressway with the windows down and Happy on full blast. the time on the way home from buffalo*s when amanda & i had our heart2heart and i was crying like a psycho. the times that robert smoked out while i drove him around & we talked about our problems. the HEB crash. the speeding ticket. the broken door [ thanks david ] ah i don*t know, i*m gonna miss it.

i*m a very very weird person. i*m happy. i really truly am. there*s like one thing in my life that isn*t going perfect but that*s not really something I can control. i mean, even if i had the chance to have that thing that*s missing, i probably still wouldn*t take it. does that make sense? yeah no one knows what i*m talking about and i*m not even going to try to begin to explain. i realized that i take a lot of things for granted. i mean, i*ve been talking to a good friend lately & he makes me realize that my problems are papitas compared to some other people*s. life is too short to be mad all the time. i know this. but being cynical, hard-headed & a bit moody is who i am. and if i*m happy with myself and my wonderful friends & family, i should be fine...right? i don*t know, this is complicated. i*m only updating because i*m bored. so i guess i*m done.

i*m going to miss my brother. i love my family. i*m glad nathan & i are friends again, eventhough we*ll be arguing by tomorrow. julian was right, we do need to get2gether at robert*s before school starts. i want a black. i need perfume. i*m excited to cruise in my new car :) i really wanna be the perfect daughter. i can pull it off, i know i can. i haven*t hung out with cici in forever. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JASON! football season will be great. drama is annoying, especially when it involves me. my brother*s good at pool but i can still beat him. i*m really thankful that my parents came through for me on this one, they*re the greatest.

whoa. last night as i was trying to go to sleep, i had a panic attack. i hadn*t had one of those in a while. i just all of a sudden started thinking about death & i started crying & couldn*t breathe. i used to contemplate that when i was younger...the fact that everyone we love will eventually have to die and after we*re dead, we*re just done. it*s inevitable and that*s what makes it so fucking scary...the fact that there*s absolutely nothing we can do to change it. the only way for me to keep going after thinking about stuff like that is to imagine that once we die, we*re reunited with our loved ones and it*s all just one big party. ok i need to stop because i*m crying right now. lol i remember when we took our gear-up trip freshman year, i was going out w/ JJ but i had a crush on johnathon. anywho, julian wasn't there so i sat with johnathon on the way back from corpus and he started talking to me about death and i was crying like a little bitch. then i got pist at him for making me feel sad and we started arguing. lol yeah that was just a random story that i remember. sorry about this fucked-up/all-over-the-place entry but that*s how it goes. peace homies <3

we*ll make the same mistakes. . .

Mon, 08 Aug 2005 03:44:46 GMT

sup homies. i haven*t been up to much except car shopping & spending time with the greatest family ever :) i think my dad & i are going to test drive the cobalt tomorrow, then depending on how much we can get it for, we*ll decide whether or not to go to Corpus to get the pretty blue one :) today i went to the mall with joey & dad to buy sunglasses. it was disgustingly packed. after that, my dad tooks us to eat at Bennigan*s. lol it was kinda funny because he was like hungover from last night when he went to mexico with my uncles. i kinda wanted to go to the party with my brother but julian benny & the girls weren't going so it seemed pointless. well i stole this from judy so yup, that*s about all for today.

CURRENT
- Current Clothes: my Dubble Bubble pajama pants & a 5K shirt
- Current Mood: bored/excited
- Current Taste: diet coke
- Current Make-up: eyeliner
- Current Hair: the messiest pony tail ever
- Current Smell: clean?
- Current thing I ought to be doing: shooting pool
- Current Desktop Picture: some blue & black trippy wallpaper
- Current Favorite Artist: hm..none at the moment
- Current Favorite Group: as i lay dying & staind [august 9- woo hoo]
- Current Book: none
- Current tape in VCR: i don*t have a vcr
- Current DVD in DVD Player: the simpsons, disk 2 season 4
- Current Color Of Toenails: sparkly pink
- Current Refreshment: diet coke
- Current Worry: school is going to start :(

Last person you...
- You Touched: my dad, i think
- You Talked to: my brother
- You Hugged: my mom
- You Instant messaged: ? i don*t remember
- You Yelled At: my brother
- You Kissed: my mom on the cheek

FAVORTIE
- Foods: chicken alfredo & chinese
- Drink: sweet tea
- Color: black & hot pink
- Album: 13 ways to bleed on stage. shadows are security
- Shoes: my pink ones :)
- Candy: payday
- Animal: puppies
- TV Show: S&TC. laguna beach. the real world
- Song: behind me lies another fallen soldier & bleed
- Vegetable: carrots
- Fruit: strawberries & plums
- Cartoon: the simpsons

ARE YOU
- Understanding: yes
- Open-minded: hm..sometimes
- Arrogant: at times
- Insecure: no
- Interesting: i can be
- Easily Amused: not so much
- Random: nah
- Hungry: no
- Friendly: it depends
- Smart: yes
- Moody: extremely
- Childish: sometimes
- Independent: yes
- Healthy: i don*t know
- Emotionally Stable: mostly
- Shy: at times
- Difficult: yes
- Bored Easily: yup
- Messy: yes
- Thirsty: no
- Responsible: yes
- Obsessed: no
- Angry: sporatically, lol
- Sad: not really
- Happy: pretty much
- Hyper: not at the moment
- Trusting: no
- Talkative: ha, wen im drunk i dont shut up. haha i*m with judy on that one
WHO DO YOU WANT TO
- Kill: osama bin laden
- Slap: julian just because
- Get High With : i don*t want to get high
- Look Like: i don*t need to look like anyone but myself
- Talk To Offline: N8 but we would only yell at each other so fuck that
- Talk To Online: the girls and someone else ;]

HAVE YOU EVER
- Been kissed? yes
- Done Drugs? no
- Eaten an entire box of Oreos? no
- Been on stage? yes
- Dumped Someone? yes
- Gotten in a car accident? yeah
- Been in love? no

FAVORTIE
-Shampoo? herbal escenses
-Toothpaste? blue
-Soap? dove
-Room in your house? mine
-Instrument? guitar

EITHER/OR
- Coffee or hot chocolate? coffee
- big or little? depends
- Lace or satin? satin
- New or old? both
- Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt? brad pitt. ah what a hottie
- Vogue or Cosmopolitan? cosmo
- Jeans or cords? jeans
- Sweater or sweatshirt? sweatshirt
- T-shirt or tank top? t-shirt
- Skirt or dress? skirt
- Wool or cotton? cotton
- Rose or Lily? rose
- Oldies or pop? oldies

IN THE LAST TWENTY FOUR HOURS HAVE YOU..
- Cried? yes
- Helped someone? i put up the groceries for my mom
- Gotten sick? no
- Gone to the movies? no
- Gone out for dinner? yes
- Said "I love you"? yes
- Written a real letter? no
- Moved on? no
- Talked to an ex? yes
- Missed an ex? yes
- Talked to someone you have a crush on? no
- Had a serious talk? yes
- Missed someone? yes
- Kissed someone? no
- Hugged someone? no
- Fought with your parents? no not really. i*m being nice lately :)
- Fought with a friend? yes

DO YOU
- Wear eye shadow? when i feel like it

- Put on a "front"? yes
- Eat with your mouth open? no
- If you got a tattoo, where would you get it? shoulder-blade
- What color is your floor/carpet in your room? pink
- What was the last CD you bought? shadows are security. chapter V on tuesday, woo hoo :D
- How did you spend last summer? with the friends & nathan
- When's the last time you showered? earlier

OTHER
- Are you lonely? no
- Are you happy? for the most part
- Are you wearing pajamas? yes
- Are you talking to someone online? no
- What is your astrological sign? taurus

wish me luck <3

Lip Gloss & Black

Fri, 05 Aug 2005 05:50:42 GMT

Hi Everyone :) Today Has Been Quite A Day. I didn*t mean for things to be so blown out of proportion. I mean, I have two friends & I was ONLY trying to help. I*m really disappointed that I would be accused but I guess that*s life & if someone though that i was deliberately trying to mess things up for them, then I guess that sucks but I'm not the type to try and prove myself to anyone. We*re friends, I told you one thing, you called me a Liar...I'm not going to try & change your mind, you should have trusted me but that*s how things go i guess. Anywho, I bummed around all day then Skootr came over to play my guitar & shoot pool. Of course i won, at poker too. After that I got in an argument with my mother & took off in my car really dramatically. LoL she knew it*s because i had to return an overdue movie, but I still thought I played it cool. Then the family went to Wallbangers and we laughed and stuff. It was nice. Woo*hoo then we went to look at my future Cobalt :D i looove that car. My mom wants me to get it :) blaaah now I*m here. Rach3L came over a little while ago to shoot pool & we talked about our usual junk then started looking for a spring break place. One of my favorite uncles is coming into town this weekend so I'm excited. Then there's Robert's little shindig so maybe I might actually have some fun. Okeydowkey, I've nothing left to say. GoodBye <3

About Me Personality Quiz
Created by jeffq1985 and taken 87296 times on bzoink!
What is your name?	Sara
How old are you?	17
When is your Birthday?	May 4, 1988
What is your zodiac sign?	Taurus
Where were you born?	Harlingen, Texas
Where do you live now?	Edinburg, Texas
What color eyes do you have?	Brown
What color hair do you have?	Brown
How tall are you?	5`1.5
How much do you weigh? (Be Honest Ladies)	I really don`t know
What is your race?	Hispanic
What is your worst fear?	Death
Do you smoke?	Cigarettes
Do you drink?	Rarely
Do you cuss?	Yes
Do you use drugs?	Never
Have you ever or will you ever steal?	I have before, but I won`t again. Unless I need to
Are you dependable and/or trustworthy?	Yes to Both
Do you play in a band or play an instrument?	I try my best to Play Guitar
Do you have any tattoos and/or piercings?	My ears are Pierced
If you had a favorite serial killer who would it be?	I don`t like serial killers
Do you suffer from depression disorder?	No
If you had a choice about how you wanted to die what would it be?	I`d want to die in my sleep
Have you ever tried to commit suicide?	No
Have you ever purposely caused harm to yourself or someone else?	No. I`ve punched people before but just in fun
What subculture do you belong too?	I`m sorry?
Are you evil?	No
Do you believe that you can be possesed?	No
Are you a paranoid person?	Sometimes
Do you ever get jealous of somebody else?	No
Are you obsessive and/or compulsive?	No
Are you a violent person?	No
Do you take your anger out on other people?	Yes
Do you blame other people for your mistakes?	Sometimes
What is your favorite game?	Jippii :D
What is your favorite movie?	I have a lot. 10 things, Varsity Blues, The Princess Bride & Troy are at the top though
Who is your favorite band?	As I Lay Dying
What is your favorite song?	Behind Me Lies Another Fallen Soldier
What kind of books and/or magazines do you read?	Teen Magazines
What is your favorite color?	Black & Hot Pink
What is your favorite food?	Chicken Alfredo, Chinese
What is your favorite drink?	Chik-Fil-A Sweet Tea
Do you own a pari of converse?	2 Pairs
Do you own a pair of dickies?	I own a Dickies shirt
Would you ever kill yourself or someone else?	No
Are you a virgin?	Yes
Are you kinky?	No
Do you like biting?	lol No
Do you masturbate?	Honestly, No
Do you watch pornography?	No. These are some pretty intense questions
Have you ever dyed your hair an unusual color?	No
Have you ever shaved your head in a socially unacceptable way?	No
Are you hyper active person?	No
Are you religious?	No
Do you have any self inflicted scars?	No
Does pain turn you on?	No. I`m not Rach3L. lol
Do you stand for originality and creativity?	Yes
Do you like meeting new people?	Sometimes
What do you like most about life?	Loved ones make it all worth while
What do you dislike most about life?	The Pain, Suffering, Starvation & Lonliness that exists
Do you believe in love at first fright?	No
Have you ever pierced a body part yourself?	No. ouch
Have you ever had to beg for dinner money?	lol no
Do you own a car?	Yes
Have you been to jail, yet?	Not Yet
Are your clothes held together with safety pins?	No
Do you have actual scars from punk rock shows?	No
Have you ever vomit while making out?	Ewww. No!
Have you held a job for less than a day?	No
Do you own more than two pair of jeans?	yes, i own like 12
Have you ever had to fuck stuff up for no good reason?	No
Have you ever been kicked out of your parents house?	No
Have you ever been fired from your job because of your attitude?	No
Does the world piss you off?	Yes!
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

i know it's hard to feel. . .

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 05:54:55 GMT

day by day i'm starting to get over my laziness. it's kinda nice. today was alright. i got up at around 12 something and called amanda up to go shopping with me. i showered and got frustrated on my way over there because my cell never works & yeah, not good times for me. i picked her up, we went to the credit union and i got lost? it's because all that damn construction confuses the shit out of me. i think i was driving on the wrong side of the road at one point. i really don't know, nor do i care. crystal called in the middle of it all and we made a negotiation. so i had to go alll the way around edinburg just to get to 10th street. we visited mando's work place & i bought some cute shirts & shades. then i bought shoes and we went to the cingular store to see my beautiful future phone. a lot of people on TV have the Razr so that's cool. anyway, after that we went alll the way to old navy, picked up food & came back here. that's when all the stupid ass confusion started but it's not really worth talking about so i won't. i mean, yeah it pisses me off that some people are two-faced & shit, but what am i gonna do about it? anywho, i dropped amanda off & decided to make a little viaje to benny's. so i went and picked up my gifts from his trip to califas. i got a personalized necklace, a cool purple shotglass & the coolest spider-man keychain ever. thanks benjoe, i love ya dawg. after that i came home and begged my mom for a new car so we'll see how that goes.

other than that, things are pretty boring. my jippii partner david isn't on so i don't know what i'm gonna do until my 4 a.m. bedtime.

where's julian?

i had a weeeird dream last night. all of my dreams are weird but this one was just...i dunno. it was kinda nice for someone to make an appearance though :) maaan, it's sad though. i mean, i'm totally ready to move on from all the bullshit i've put myself through and the one person that i thought could help me is unattainable. grrreat. what luck.

my brother's leaving pretty soon. i forgot that feeling. the emptiness of not having him here. it's been really nice to fight with him and laugh with him, but he's going to leave & things are gonna go back to how they were. it sucks i know, but change is something that i'm going to have to get used to, considering i'm going to be a senior and there's a whooole lot of stuff that i'm going to have to deal with. this coming year is gonna be crazy. football season is gonna fly by, i'm gonna breeze through my classes & i have a feeling that all this other shit is gonna get in the way. i miss cici. where is that girl? alright well i don't have a lot to say so i guess i'm done.

monah, your dad is in my prayers :)

-sara

no you*re giving off vibes of frustration. . .

Tue, 02 Aug 2005 20:05:30 GMT

hiii* well i'm frustrated as usual. it seems like this world is full of stupid people & i just can't seem to avoid them...

let's see. yesterday was registration. it was kinda hard getting up at 10:30, but i managed and picked up amanda. it was weird being at school for the first time in like 2 months. we got there and julian found us so he made us laugh. then rach3L got kicked out for refusing to take off her sunglasses. lol that was funny, power to the people! we saw julie :) then talked to JJ robert & wally while the lines for the counselors never got smaller. i was there FOREVER! we got there at 11 and didn't leave until 1:30. my predictions about my dumb counselor were soo accurate. she didn't know how to do anything so she had to ask some other lady and they were giving me shit. of course i looked mad because i HATE waiting & i was there forever and of course it's frustrating when someone you're supposed to listen to and respect is dumber than dirt. so whatever, the mean lady was trying to take away my lunch but she was talking to my counselor like i wasn't there, saying "just take away her lunch! give her classes 5th and 6th" and i was like "whooa, you can't take away my lunch, i need it. u can't do that". i was piiist. then they were trying to put me in classes that i had originally wanted, but they told me i couldn't get them? it was sooo dumb. i had to tell them "you already said i couldn't do that...why are you trying to put me in it?!". then i got a lecture about how i had an attitude and i was venting my frustration on the wrong people & i needed to stop. fuck you, lady. so after we left...i complained then amanda & i went to go check the jerseys in mcallen. they're gonna come out nice :)

after that, we went picked up chik-fil-a and came over here to watch tv and meet Rach3L the Rebel. blaaah, i was so sleepy. my aunt, uncle and little cousins showed up and my brother got great news through the mail so we ordered chinese and ate, then my brother & i had a pool tournament. i lost 10 bucks but oh well. amanda & i then watched Laguna Beach which was what i had been looking forward to all day. after it was over, i dropped her off, came home and had a nice Heart2Heart with David. it was weird to have a good solid conversation with out the frequent "fuck you"s and "i hate you"s. lol but yeah we're pretty much in the same boat but it's all good. we played jippi and of course i won so i should be expecting a delivery some time today. he was supposed to be my slave for a day last week because i guessed his pop-tart flavor but he chickened out.

ughghhg! and then today, i got my ass up and went to try to pay for my pan-am class. i went to Mom's work to pick up the check then i headed over to pan am. the building that i needed to go to ended up being closed for construction, so i had to search for the temporary building and when i finally found it, the line to pay was HUGE. i waited in line for 45 minutes with the most pissed off look on my face. when i FINALLY get to the window to pay, the lady tells me in the most upbeat way "oh, you're supposed to give this to your school, not us :) " i was sooo mad. WHY WOULD YOU PUT "PAY AT PAYMENTS & COLLECTIONS" IF I'M SUPPOSED TO GIVE IT TO MY SCHOOL? ohhhh my god, dumb people in this world. and she says "oh, we just wanted to let you know how much you owe"..well if all the payments are supposed to be done through the school, why not let THEM tell me how much i owe?

saves que? WHATEVER.

benny's supposed to stop by to drop off my present from California :) so we'll see how that goes. bye loves <3

patrick vs. T.I. nick vs. kevin K-Fed vs. JT

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 05:03:51 GMT

hi guys :) i don't need to explain how lazy i've been because i'm sure everyone already knows. i've just been chillin out here allll day long and i love it. rach3L came over at around 12 last night and didn't leave til 5. we talked about a looot of stuff and had a blast. we tried to think of all these match-ups between everyone at our school and celebrities. T.I. kicked amanda's ass. haha so yeah we talked about everyone and everything and i came inside and crashed out. oh yeah the family came over yesterday also and kicked my unc's ass at pool. what can i say, i'm the shit when it comes to stuff like that. i got a phone call at around 5:30. i wasn't aware that i look like a drug dealer but i guess that's nice to know? haha. and today was alright. i woke up at my usual time and watched some tv. then went over to nate's cuz i hadn't seen him in about 7 years. lol i was aiming for him but i suck so i knocked down his souvenier shotglasses with a pillow. they broke :( i'm super sorry camarada. he didn't get mad but i still felt bad. i was real frustared because i needed to put gas at a shell station cuz i had a gas card and the only 2 i knew about closed down so i was driving around with like no gas and i was scared. but i finally got to a shell station, got some whataburger and came home. and now i'm just here. i went to go smoke a cig outside a little while ago and i heard something running in the orchards. i got real scared so i put out the cig and started running toward my house. on my way, my shorts fell to my ankles. it was real embarrassing eventhough no one saw. lmao pretty funny but stupid nonetheless. registration is tomorrow. yuuuuck. it might be nice to see everyone but i'm not in the mood for waiting around and arguing with counselors because it's so obvious that none of them know what they're doing. alright i guess i'm done for now. bye everyone <3 and good luck to all my football friends who start 3-a-days tomorrow :)

...well you better go catch it. eh-heh eh-heh eh-heh

Fri, 29 Jul 2005 07:08:30 GMT

heeeey everyone* i hope everyone is doing wonderfully, as for me, i'm ok. before today i hadn't gone ANYWHERE in about a week. my car had been parked in the same spot since last thursday. it was pretty weird. but i have fun chillaxing here. anyway, i went to get chik-fil-a for lunch then came back home and took a nap. then i bothered my mom into taking me to the mall so we went. i love my mom, she's the greatest. anyway, i bought the polo i had been wanting from AE and i bought two purses so that was cool. sooo, we went to mervyn's because she had to make a payment or something and on our way out to the car some ugly cockroach was chasing us. lol it was super funny but we were scared. anyway, we picked up some #6s and came home. then rach3L came over and we shot pool, played darts, attempted to play cards then came inside & made phone calls. lol yeah that was pretty hilarious. she left so now i'm here pretty bored. this entry was pretty dumb if you ask me so i'm just gonna quit right now. peace <3
-s.e.c.

i'm so amped. . .

Wed, 27 Jul 2005 00:15:37 GMT

Well I guess it's about time I updated. Everything's the same...nothing out of the ordinary. I haven't really gone out with the friends or done anything in about a week. The other day my brother & I met my parents for dinner & they kinda all ganged up on me. I felt really bad because everything they said was sorta true. I don't have a job. I'm lazy. I dropped my Pan-Am classes. All I do is complain & ask for money. I have an attitude problem. I knew all of this stuff about myself but it kinda hurt to hear it all at once from the people I love the most. They weren't really doing it to hurt me, they were just sorta making fun of me, but either way...I had a hard time talking to them for the rest of the day. Anyway, my days have pretty much consisted of watching TV until 4 a.m., waking up at 2, watching more TV or playing pool & then going to sleep. Last night Amanda came over to watch the Laguna Beach Season Premiere. Kristin is reallly starting to piss me off but I'm never gonna stop watching the damn show so I don't know why i complain.

So school is starting pretty soon. I'm not gonna say that I'm happy about it but I guess it's time for me to quit with this shit that I've been doing. We need to make our SENIOR shirts for the picture & order our jerseys. But I'm not in the mood to get on the ball, so whatever, maybe Rach3L and Amanda will make me do something.

I miss Julian. I haven't talked to him in about 2 weeks & I don't know why. I'm kinda scared to call him because his moods change. Sometimes he's in the mood to listen to me complain & sometimes he's not. Maybe I'm the problem? I don't know, but as of right now...things aren't all that great.

I'm gonna miss my friend ;[

awww AJ's here & his baby is the cutest baby EVER. She's the prettiest, happiest baby I've ever seen & i want one one. No I don't. But yeah, I just wanted to write about her.
well I guess I'm done. I hope everyone is doing well. <3

Sat, 23 Jul 2005 05:25:33 GMT

so today & yesterday were pleasant. i really wanted to go shopping yesterday so i told amanda & then claree told us about our boys* last 7 on 7 game so we had to go. i picked up claree [ missed her street and had to go all the way around ] then we picked up amanda and headed to the game. the guys did really good :] julio*s the shit, too bad i*m not getting his jersey anymore. after josh made us laugh and it got a little boring, it was 7:30 and the mall closes at 9 so i hauled ass over there & did some shopping. i bought some shirts and some cuuute shoes :) after the mall amanda & i raced rach3L & claree to chik-fil-a but not before seeing that weeeird guy pick his nose for like a minute straight. lol it was disgusting but i couldn*t turn away. i munched out at chik-fil-a, dropped claree off & then went to robert*s to chill. i smoked some blacks outside [ very nice ] then i got suuuper bored so i came home an hour before curfew? eh, then i talked to nathan & he filled me in on his badass trip to SanFran. i*m so jealous, i should have gone with my parents, i*m such a stupid girl.

i woke up to a whole lotta noise this morning. the phone was ringing non stop, there was all this thumping & banging from the attic and doors opening & closing. it sucked. i woke up, watched Boy Meets World, then got ready to go to the mall yet again with the mother, godmother, and dad. we shopped around, i bought some stuff & then we ate at johnny carino's. oh yeah, my mom got in another argument with the manager of bealls*. lol those people can never do anything right. yadda yadda yadda, we ate, came home & now i*m here. we don*t have airconditioning right now so i*m forced to sit at my computer with a fan blowing in my face. it feels nice :) i played pool by myself a little while ago. i won :D ooookeydowkey, i*m bored beyond belief but i*d rather be here than out for some strange reason. i stole this from one of camarada sarah nick*s friends, hope she doesn*t mind :) i can*t get enough of these stupid surveys.

eh, i did the survey but i don*t want to post it. bye <3

keep your mouth shut when you*re talking to me

Thu, 21 Jul 2005 04:58:08 GMT

gosh. what a waste. all the hype about Emily turned out to be worthless. chik-fil-a was closed for NO reason. that made me mad. anywho, i woke up at around 2 today. dad & brother asked me to go to the movies with them so i did and Wedding Crashers was such a great movie :) i liked it a lot. after the movie i came home, rach3L came over & we went to target, bealls & Jack in the Box. i bought a cute belt and some jeans & bought her earrings because i bought amanda earrings yesterday & i like to treat the friends equally :)

yaaaay i*m talking to claree. how sad that she*s one of my best friends & i get happy when we chat. it*s because we all haven*t seen her in about a month & things just aren*t the same. i used to have such a blast going out with those 3 but since things kinda got messed up, it hasn*t been as much fun. i*m hoping things will get better when school starts. . . everything has to get better.

so i watched Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind early this morning & it really got me thinking. i'm disappointed that i didn't get to finish it because i fell asleep...but the concept of erasing a person from one's memory is really something to contemplate. i bet that one question, or statement rather, has come across all of our minds at one point or another. "i wish i had never met him". i thought that for a while myself. but it's not true. i questioned whether or not, if given the opportunity, if i would want to erase a person from my memory. would i wanna shelter myself from emotional pain? would i want to take back all the memories that i've made with different people? absolutely not. everyone is bound to experience a heartbreak at one point in their life. but even in the worst possible heartbreak, there's always a lesson to be learned. there's always the knowledge that you were once truly happy. the knowlege that the person who you would erase has made a big impact on your life & to want to eliminate something like that would be weak & foolish & immature. even if something isn't going to last forever, the short amount of time that you're truly happy is worth all the while. screw the future. if you think you love someone...tell them. don't think too much about things. don't worry about getting hurt or hurting someone else, just be together and always follow your heart. because even as your heart is breaking and you're in the process of recovery, you have to realize that those good times & bad times make you who you are. not everything can be perfect because if it were, you wouldn't know when something truly feels right. sure...if we could erase certain people, we'd save ourselves a hell of a lot of heartache, tears and constant unwanted thinking...but what we'd be risking is so much more & it freaks me out that i realized all of this over the course of 5 minutes.

<3*

"i can get you an impersonator for cheaper" - cici. lmao

Wed, 20 Jul 2005 05:03:40 GMT

my parents are back in town :] yaaaaay! i*m so glad they*re back. they bought me a bunch of cool stuff :] mostly earrings because i*m a sucker for those. today i went shopping with amanderz. we were supposed to travel to the mall but my mom said no due to the millions of inches of rain that was supposed to come. so we just went to flip-side target payless etc. after i shopped & changed my mind too many times, we met cici at sonic & ate some badass tots. i left the boy a tip because i*m a nice person. yeah we ate, i dropped off cici, then amanda and i came home. the parents were going crazy & were in a bad mood so i had to clean or something, i don*t really remember. i organized my make-up box, jewelery box and purse box [ i had a thousand purses in my car & now they*re neatly organized :) ] then i watched some of the new WSOP, S&TC and played pool with the family. my dad & i lost so that sucks. i can*t play outside in the grass because emily*s supposed to make an appearance so here is this stimulating survey for your reading pleasure :-\
ABOUT YOU
Your full name: Sara Elisa Cantu
Age: 17
Height: 5`1.5
Natural hair colour: brown
Eye colour: brown
Number of siblings: 1. i <3 joey
Glasses/contacts?: neither
Piercings: just my ears
Tattoos: none but i want one
Braces :: never had them. chester cheetah
FAVOURITE
Color :: black & hot pink
Band : As I Lay Dying
Song : behind me lies another fallen soldier; bleed; world so cold are among the many
Stuffed animal: lol my puppies that sing "i got you babe"
Video game: grand theft auto
TV show: S&TC
Movie: chingos
Book: the da'vinci code. to kill a mockinbird
Food: chinese & chicken alfredo
Game on a cell phone: snake
CD cover: shadows are security
Flower: roses & lilac
Scent: paris hilton. black. lacoste. rain smell
Animal: puppies
Comic book: spiderman fo'sho
Cereal: trix. cookie crisp. captain crunch
Website: livejournal.com
Cartoon: the simpsons <3
DO YOU
Play an instrument?: un poco de guitar
Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?: lately i have
Like to sing?: only to old pop songs
Have a job?: what a stupid question
Have a cell phone?: yeah & it's a piece of shit so leave me alone
Like to play sports?: yeah it's fun but i suck
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: nah
Have a crush on someone?: hee-hee ;] . that's exactly what it is
Live somewhere NOT in the united states?: nope
Have more than 5 TVs in your house?: nope
Have any special talents/skills?: i can fold my tongue.
Excercise daily?: nah
Like school?: only the social part
CAN YOU
Sing the alphabet backwards?: i doubt it
Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?: it's hard
Speak any other languages?: a liiiitle bit of spanish
Go a day without food?: yup yup
Stay up for more than 24 hours?: yes
Read music, not just tabs?: no i need tabs
Roll your tongue?: yeah
Eat a whole pizza?: no
HAVE YOU EVER
Snuck out of the house?: no. never
Cried to get out of trouble?: too many times
Gotten lost in your city?: nope
Seen a shooting star?: yup
Been to any other countries besides the united states?: mexico
Had a serious surgery?: no
Stolen something important to someone else?: yes! or maybe it was amanda. lol it was some stupid thing from some girl's volleyball locker
Solved a rubiks cube?: no
Gone out in public in your pajamas?: yup yup
Cried over a girl?: no i don't think so
Cried over a boy?: yeah it happens
Kissed a random stranger?: no
Hugged a random stranger?: sort of
Been in a fist fight?: unfortunately no
Been arrested?: no
Done drugs?: no
Had alcohol?: yes
Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?: it was cola & it hurt
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?: no
Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?: no that would be dumb
Swore at your parents?: yes. i got in trouble. but i was just so mad
Been to warped tour?: nope
Kicked a guy where it hurts?: lol yeah i think i almost made N8 cry
Been in love?: no
Been close to love?: um...i dunno? i don't think so
Been to a casino?: yes
Ran over an animal and killed it?: no
Broken a bone?: nope
Gotten stitches?: nope
Had a waterballoon fight in winter?: nope
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?: no
Made homemade muffins?: yes
Bitten someone?: i'm sure i have at some point in my life
Been to disneyland/disneyworld?: disneyland :)
More than 5 times?: no
Been to niagra falls?: no
Burped in someones face?: yuuup
Gotten the chicken pox?: i think so
WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU
Brushed your teeth: earlier today
Went to the bathroom: a few hours ago
Saw a movie in theaters: amityville horror. a long! time ago
Read a book: it's been a while
Had a snow day: christmas :)
Had a party: it was a small social gathering...on saturday
Had a slumber party: saturday
Made fun of someone: lol my mom brother & i made fun of my dad like 10 minutes ago
Tripped in front of someone: hm...7th grade?
Went to the grocery store: yesterday
Got sick: i don't remember?
Cursed: hours ago
PICK ONE
Fruit/vegetables: fruits
Black/white: black
Lights on/lights off: off
TV/movie: movie
Car/truck: truck
Body spray/lotion: body spray
Cash/check: cash
Pillows/blankets: blankets
Headache/stomach ache: i'd rather have a headache
Paint/charcoal: paint
Chinese food/mexican food: chinese duh!
Summer/winter: winter
Snow/rain: rain <3
Fog/misty: fog
Rock/rap: rock
Meat/vegetarian: meat
Boy/girl: boys
Chocolate/vanilla: strawberry
Sprinkles/icing: icing
Cake/pie: both
French toast/french fries: fries
Strawberries/blueberries: strawberries
Ocean/swimming pool: ocean
Hugs/kisses: both
Cookies/muffins: cookies
p33n/bewbz: fo'sho
Wallet/pocket: wallet
Window/door: door
Emo/goth: emo
Pink/purple: pink!
Cat/dog: dog
Long sleeve/short sleeve: long sleeve
Pants/shorts: pants
Winter break/spring break: winter break
Spring/autumn: autumn
Clouds/clear sky: clouds
Moon/mars: moon :) it's pretty to look at
FRIENDSHIP
How many friends do you have?: a lot, but super close friends...9
What are their names?: the close friends are amanda rach3L claree judy julian benny robert N8 & cici
Do you have a best friend?: amanda!
Have you ever liked one of your friends?: as in LikeLike...all the guys on my close friends list. lol
Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?: more guy friends. they're so easy to get along with
Have you ever lost a friend?: yes
Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?: supersplash & shlitterbaun
Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?: lol the light poll with judy. elbows with amanda.
Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?: yes. i always get in them with N8 & rach3L & julian
Whats the nicest thing youve ever done for a friend?: one day when amanda was feeling down i went to her house with munchies so she could have someone to talk to
Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?: let me crash at their place when i got in trouble with the law. lol
Do you miss any of your old friends?: claree & amanda garza. aww & i miss being close with julio
What friend have you known the longest?: lauren since 3rd grade
Do you regret anything youve done to a friend?: yes, a few things
If so, what is it?: i don't really remember
How often do you spend time with your friends?: i spend enough time with them
Do any of your friends drive?: yup. pretty much all of them
Has a friend of yours ever died?: no
Whats the dumbest thing youve done with a friend?: toooo many things
What do you think your friends think of you?: i guess they like me because they're all pretty straight forward & if they didn't like me they best tell me
LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP
Have you ever been in love?: nah
If you have, with who?: n/a
Are you single?: yes
Are you in a relationship?: no
If so, for how long?: n/a
Do you believe there is someone for everyone?: i want to believe that
What is your idea of the best date?: a movie, or the park
What was your first kiss like?: cute. julian tapped me on the shoulder at the valentines dance and when i turned around he planted one on me while everyone was watching and said "Awww"
Do you think love is a load of shit?: lol sometimes
Whats the best experiance youve ever had with the opposite sex: some days last summer were just awesome
If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?: yes
Have you ever been dumped?: twice
Have you ever dumped someone?: 3 times
Whats the most sexual thing youve done with the opposite sex?: i dunno. nothing very serious
WORD ASSOCIATION
Slippers: bunnies
Hat: dance
Hard: candy
Free: spirits
Space: jam
Taste: test
Good charlotte: sucks
Red: pen
Deep: sea
Heart: broken
Cord: phone
Cheese: dip
Rain: fall
Work: hard
Pedal: hard
Head: strong
Bed: sleep
Fluff: pillow
Hardcore: bitch
Race: car
Knife: cut
Jump: high
I....
am: chillin
want: to go shopping
need: to get over things
crave: nothing
love: my friends
hate: your face
did: bad at poker
feel: worried
miss: football season
am annoyed by: things
would rather: be at the beach
am tired of: doing nothing
will always: be myself
SILLY STUFF
What is your favourite genre of music?: rock
What time is it now?: 11:52 p.m.
What day is it?: tuesday
Whens the last time you called someone?: i called nathan back earlier
How much money do you have right now?: 51 dollars. judy i have your 20..remind me cuz i'll spend it
Are you hungry?: nope
Whatcha doin?: this survey
Do you like parades?: no
Do you like the moon?: yes
What are you going to do when youre done with this?: probably talk to whoever's online cuz i'm bored
Isnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?: no not really. you're easily amused
If you could have any magical power what would it be?: i want to fly
Have you ever had a picnic?: no
Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?: nope
What about sock em boppers?: yeah dude. all the time :-\
Are you wearing any socks right now?: capris with a purple t-shirt
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE
funny?: when i'm drunk
pretty?: once in a while if i decide to fix myself...i'm decent
sarcastic?: fuck yes
lazy?: extreeemely
hyper?: sometimes
friendly?: no
evil?: no
smart?: yes
strong?: no
talented?: no
dorky?: yup
ASSOCIATE THESE WORDS WITH SOMEONE YOU KNOW (or dont know)
high: cici!
skip: judy
dance: rach3L
lonely: benny?
pen: N8
flower: lori
window: julian?
psycho: claree. lol
brain freeze: amanda
orange: M&M
sassy: mrs.neidnstadt!
jelly: carlos
FOR OR AGAINST
suicide: against
love: for
drunk drivers: against
airplanes: for
war: against
canada: for
united states: for
rock music: for
gay marriage: for. just let them be happy
school: against
surveys: FOR!
parents: for
cars: for
killing: against
britney spears: against
coffee: for
pants: for
WOULD YOU EVER
Sky dive?: yes
Play strip poker?: no
Run away?: no
Curse at a teacher?: yeah if they pist me off enough
Not take a shower for a week?: no
Ask someone out?: not sure
Lie to someone to make them think better of you?: no
Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:yes. france or italy
Go scuba diving?: maybe
Write a book?: yes
Become a rockstar?: no
Have casual sex?: no
LAST QUESTIONS
What shampoo do you use?: suave or whatever's in the shower
Whens the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?: i don't know?
What kind of computer do you have?: Dell
What grade are you in?: SeNioRs 'O6 woo-hoo
Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?: no cuz that would piss me off if someone did it to me
Or just make out?: i think i've only made out once in a movie?
How many posters do you have in your room?: 5 maybe
How many cds do you have?: enough to keep me occupied
What time is it now?: 12:01 a.m.

so i thought a lot last night. i'm gonna have to say something. i'm gonna have to just completely pour my heart out so that i can be done with it. no, i probably won't. i adore the friendship too much & maybe it'll go away because i'm thinking of that someone else...and he said to take care. lol, yeah i'm dumb. peace out

you know what i`m sayin`?

Sun, 17 Jul 2005 20:38:59 GMT

sooo...i`ve been lazy. aint no big suprise there. the only time i would leave my house for a week was to go get food because we have zero groceries. rach3L had been coming over a lot & that was pretty cool. the day before yesterday my brother`s friends came over & we all ended up watching movies & making fun of people`s feet. & yesterday was ok also. well, i had fun but i just hate embarrassing myself. rach3L came over followed by cici & jaynie. lol we sat in cici`s car for a while but her plan didn`t succeed. i just ended up with nasty smelling clothes. julian got here & so did judy. lol pobresita, she thought we were ignoring her calls. after i got out of the shower we started playing card games and that game of F*ck the Bitch reaaallly messed me up. oh then robert showed up and so did LeeRoy Misa Manda & Benny. i got to smoke a lot of blacks so that made me really happy. whatever, i`m an idiot & threw up. special thanks to judy & amanda for taking care of my drunkass :) i won`t be doing that again for a loooong time. spring break `O6 maybe. so whatever i wanted to fall asleep on the toilet but no one let me so they put me to bed with the fan in my face. it felt so good :) then N8 & Dion came and i was sooo embarrassed. we all chilled in my room & random people kept coming in to let me in on all the drama that i couldn`t see for myself. some asshole was writing on my face with make-up. dion was telling the girls to make me food cuz he`s camara. i got my ass up and played some Hold `Em. everyone was a pretty drunk so it didn`t work out too well. people left & rach3L and i went to go get whataburger. we came back, ate & took carlos home. then i came back and i had soooo much fun bothering julian & benny while they were trying to go to sleep. it was hilarious. they wanted to go to sleep at around 4 but we kept poking at them and jumping and yelling and rach3L was humping them while we recorded it. lol it sounds sick but it`s not because we`re all great friends like that :) whatever around 5 i was tiiired so i went to sleep in my parents` room & left manda judy julian & benny in my room. i got about 3 whole hours of sleep then i woke up and went to check on them. lol they were awake laughing and talking about the night before. and they were all bitching because of all the light that comes through my windows. so yuuup, we laughed some more then benny wanted orange juice so we attempted to make it & it came out fucked up. julian cleaned up a bit then he & benny left. judy stayed & helped clean because she`s the greatest. she washed my clothes & folded them while i slept :) & the parents are coming home in a few hours and i`m so excited. i really miss them. some people would usually be disappointed when their parents come back from out of town but i`m really happy. i`m disappointed in myself that i got drunk 3 times in a week. i didn`t want to but shit happens & now it`s out of my system and i can do without it for a looong while. my body hurts, i don`t know if i fell a lot of what but i have scratches & bruises. okay well i`m going to try & take a nap or something. i probably sound stupid for writing down all the details of last night but i had fun & i know it`s gonna be one of those nights that i`m gonna remember for a while :) i <3 my friends & thanks to those who helped me out. ppppeace homie G.

shut up benny

Fri, 15 Jul 2005 20:49:11 GMT

wudda do? i*m bored & i have cleaning to do so i*m sad. yesterday was a fun day. i realized that every day revolves around Boy Meets World at 2:00. anywho, i bummed around then rach3L came over. we played pool then judy & robert showed up & we played cards. F*ck the Bitch is the coolest card game ever. judy & i killed a bottle of malibu so that started the fun :) then cici priss & big mo` got there to help with the entertainment. yaaay then julian benny & leeroy showed up. the MDizzle that JJ brought me didn*t taste too bad but everyone was making me feel gross so i had to throw up. thanks judy. after that i just laughed at about everything there is to laugh about. lol like the first time amanda met cici & julian telling benny to shut up and me needing to chill out. judy & i were gonna climb the light tower thingy but on our way up some dude pulled out a gun and was like "you better not". i dunno, it was weird. lol. oh yeah and robert's story about the stars making pictures and fighting each other was trippped out. uhhh then everyone left & rach3L & i whipped up everything in my kitchen. we were super hungry...i don*t know why. lol, so she left & i talked to a camarada and got a hugeass headache. it was terrible. then i crashed out, woke up at 2 today, got chik-fil-a and now i*m here. i think my bro*s having a get2gether or something tonight so i dunno what i*m gonna do. we*ll see. byyyyeeee :]

FAVORITES
[COLOR]: black & hotpink :)
[NUMBER]: 33 baby
[SUBJECT:] english
[CLOTHING BRAND:] aeropostale, delia*s, anything from hot topic :)
[SHOE BRAND:] monolo blahniks. lol no i*m kidding. i like converse
[SPORT TO PLAY:] football :)
[DRINK:] chik-fil-a sweet tea
[ANIMAL:] puppies
[HOLIDAY:] christmas. halloween. anything that gets me out of school
[BAND(s):] As I Lay Dying <3
[MOVIE:] i have tons

-.W H O.-

[makes you laugh the most?]: rach3L & JJ lately
[makes you smile]: all of my friends
[has a crush on you?]: i dunno?

-.H A V E.Y O U.E V E R.-

[fallen for your best friend]: yup yup
[been rejected]: sort of
[rejected someone]: yup yup
[used someone]: nope
[been cheated on]: yes. julian*s a bitch
[done something you regret]: yeah

-.W H O.W A S.T H E.L A S T.P E R S O N.-

[you talked to on the phone]: Nathan
[hugged]: Julian or Leeroy?
[you instant messaged]: i don*t remember
[you laughed with]: rach3L

-.D O.Y O U / A R E.Y O U.-

[smoke cigarettes]: yeah & i don*t care to hear anyone*s opinion on it either
[obsessive]: nah
[could you live without the computer?]: yes
[how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: 63
[what's your favorite food?]: chicken alfredo from olive garden
[whats your favorite fruit?]: strawberries & plums
[drink alcohol?]: not often at all
[like watching sunrises or sunset]: sunsets
[trust others way too easily?]: no

-.N U M B E R.-

[of times I have had my heart broken? ]: hm...half maybe, haha
[of hearts u have broken?]: i*m not sure
[of continents I have lived in?]: 1
[of good friends?]: 9. i can name them for you, but i won*t
[of cd's that I own?]: a lot, they*re in a stack in my car
[of scars on my body ?]: 4 maybe
[of things in my past that I regret?]: 2

-.P I C K.O N E.-

[MARRY PERFECT FRIEND OR PERFECT LOVER]: perfect friend :)
[CATS OR DOGS]: dogs
[1 PILLOW OR 2]: 2
[W/ OR W/O ICE CUBES]: with
[TOP OR BOTTOM]: ?
[WINTER/SPRING/SUMMER/FALL]: winter
[NIGHT OR DAY:] night
[GLOVES OR MITTENS:] mittens?
[DRESSED OR UNDRESSED:] dressed
[BUNK OR WATER BED:] water bed
[MTV OR VH1: ] fuse
[OCEAN OR POOL:] ocean

<3

judy is suuuch a queery queerness

Wed, 13 Jul 2005 06:43:33 GMT

hello darlings :] i haven*t done anything at all these past couple of days. i hadn*t even left the house up until about 2 hours ago when i went to whataburger. so yup, nothing interesting. i*m got pretty mad today because someone started accusing me of stupid shit. i didn*t do it! i have the time but i*m not a pathetic loser who would be prank calling people when i don*t even have their numbers? did you expect me to look it up in the phone book or call information? idiot. not worth talking about anymore. awww man i*m having so much fun right now talking to judy about the old days. she*s one of my favorite people to reminisce with because we remember a lot of the same things & it*s hilarious. we*re looking at our old yearbooks and people have changed so much. it*s sad that we*re all growing up and it*s sad to see how much fun we had while we were immature. shit, we*re still immature but things are a bit more complicated now. the simplicity of it all was bliss. we thought our relationships would last forever & any little thing that was going wrong was the end of the world. i*m going to leave you with a few things that some of my best friends left on my yearbook years back. it*s gonna make me happy to look at them someday...so here you go :)

lmao chingos of people wrote "creed rox" because i was in love with them & they wanted to make me happy. & when ppl would say "don*t party too hard" wtf would we do when we were in 7th grade? lol the most we would do was watch movies at someone*s house or go to the movies. what*s ^, v and all @?

"Hey Cutie. I really have nuttin 2 say, just that I hope u have a nice summer. I'm really gonna miss you, like if u know. Talkin smack on my yearbook. I hope we can get 2gether in the summer. But i'm not worth it. Soooo. good luck next year with me or guys in case u have different plans for us. Laters. your babe, cutie, whatever u wanna call me, julian. CREED ROX. I <3 You [ like if u care ]" - JJ

"Hey sara, it was nice & will always be nice having you as a friend. hope to see you next year. p.s. i love you j/j. <3 clarissa alejandro"

" Sara. This was a cool year and next one will be better because we are gonna rule the school just like Limp Bizket does. I hope we can still be friends. Keep in touch and don't change teh way u are. Limp kicks Creed's @ss. Benny Farias"

"From the best drummer to the next best, good luck next year & have a great summer" - M&M

" Wuz ^, well thanks for being such a cool friend and u better never break ^ with my friend [julian] cause then you'll want him. i know he loves you a lot, trust me, i feel him. so try not to, ya'll better stay together 4ever. alright?! well g2g thanks for everything. p.s. i'm not gay" Josh V.

"Sara, Hey have a great summer. thanks 4 backing me up when i needed someone. i will always be thankful of that. thanks for backing me up in occasions like this one. if you need anythihng or have a question about anything, u can come to me. i will always be your friend. i appreciate everything you've done for me. your badazz friend, eddie"

"Hey!" lol ruben said that. he didn*t even sign his name.
"Creed rocks, have a great summer" - Patrick
"Hey sara. you were a badass friend to have & i hope you feel the same bout me. love, roger. creed rox!"

" Sup Wayne. How u doing? well this year has been pretty cool too, despite that whole Josh thing ( man i hate him) don't say anything cuz i know you're thinking something...well you've been a cool rock friend, nice to know that i found a chick that likes the same stuff i do. well thanks for everything this year. party on wayne. rock on, your bud- robert"

" hey babie! wuts ^ girlie. it's finally over again & hey thanks for being such a kewl and happy buddy! we made it through middle school hope we keep being friends all througout high. don't ever change keep being kuckie funny & kewl! thanks for helpin with so much w/ everything & everyone. hope to see u next year & hope we're still best buds. keep in touch & don't forget about me! <3 manda G."

lol aaron pretty much put the exact same thing that robert did.

" hey sara. sup me not much just here dude i write so ugly. well it was nice having you as a friend and i hope we will stay friends 4ever. i can't wait til my 15th thing hope u will still get to be in it with DAVID hottie well hope u have fun in the summer and maybe we can see each other then well g2g. T/C/C/I/C. best buds <3 jennifer"

" Hey Babe. how you doin. this year was fun because of u of course. na
h but thanks for being there everytime i needed you. hope to see you as a fish. Laterz. Jason Moreno"

"Sara. Hey Wuz ^? thanks 4 being such a great friend. ur pretty kewl sometimes, stupid but ur pretty kewl most of the time. well have a nice summer & i'll see u next year. PINKY! ur friend, amanda"

" sara, hey chika, this is judy writing in your yearbook a year late. well n/e ways hello goodbye have a great rest of the year. i <3 S.O.S. you <3 julian."

lol ok this is boring me already. goodbye everyone!

2 good
+2 be
_______
4 gotten puro 6 chix of `06! except for judy of `05 :(

wait outside in your underwear

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 07:43:34 GMT

hiii* everyone :] these past two days have been so chilled out & i absolutely love it :) yesterday i did nooothing all day. & today was a little more productive. i went grocery shopping and to el pato, then rach3L nathan cici & dion came over. stupid boy trying to teach me & cici how to smoke :-\ muy chingon. so yuuup, they played pool & i just chilled. nathan was dancing all over the place like a moron so that was kinda entertaining. after n8 & dion left, cici rach3L and i burned things and then cecilia left us. then it was just rach & i and we burned a junebug :-\ and came inside to discuss all the football jersey junk. i have someone new :) man it was so weird. like all that talk about senior year & football got me thinking about this boy. he*s like the onnnly guy from my school that i*ve had a crush on in like 3 years & i just all of a sudden started to think about him & it*s pretty weird. hee-hee. [ todo gay ] buut anywho, i*m not telling anyone but rach3L knows what*s up ;) so after we got all that junk cleared up, we made fun of james [ one of my favorite past times ] . lol i love that guy. yeah i got some pretty sad news but i*m not allowed to tell anyone so that got me kinda down but not really. rach & i tried a little experiment outside but it didn*t work so i was disappointed. we came inside, she made me laugh some more & left. so now i*m here, suuuuper bored. i*m really happy that i have nothing to do next week. i*m going to sleep as late as i want everyday. i actually have money to go shopping. i dunno, i*m kinda weird because i don*t like to go out much. usually teenagers are supposed to be all about having fun & partying but i gotta be in juuuust the right mood. heeeey JJ comes back tomorrow :) i haven*t talked to him in like a week. okeydowkey...i think i*m done. hee-hee. ugh leave it to me to start thinking about someone that i*m too shy to call & that i probably won*t see until school starts. peace!

look...i can put my foot on top of my head

Sun, 10 Jul 2005 00:49:23 GMT

hi journal. last night was quite the adventure. the parents left in the morning so the afternoon was real chilled out. rach3L brought me wendy*s & i just lounged around all day. people started showing up for a get2gether & it started off really cool. we attempted to make margaritas & they didn*t come out right but they still did the job :) i was feeling reaaally good ;] so happy. by the time the tpg* girlies showed up i didn*t really know what was going on but i had fun for the most part. my buzz wore off & by the time i knew it there were all these people that i didn*t know & i was getting really frustrated because boys were throwing up all over the place, my house was dirty & i was getting annoyed. i met some of my brother*s friends & some of them are really cool :] i talked to nicole & she turned out to be badass...i had never actually talked to her. annywho, lorissa jason & derly showed up but i didn*t get to talk to them much. i think robert was here too. so yeah i had to guide people to the restroom, get drunk people water, laugh at marc asleep on the toilet and talk to the other mark who was just a viaje by himself. omg that guy was pretty cool. at around 3 i drove to aj*s to bring rach3L & amanda back & by the time we got back here [ after almost running over an animal ] things had chilled out & there were just a couple of people passed out on the rug that had vomit on it. gross. i fell asleep & it was great. today i woke up to a disgustingly dirty house. amanda*s camera got stolen so that sucks really bad. she was here pretty much all day. she helped me wash dishes & then she left & now i'm here sola. cici came, picked up money and brought back whataburger. it was soo good. i had planned on having a get2gether tonight but i*m soo not in the mood anymore so maybe i*ll just take a nice bubble bath and go to sleep early :] okeydowkey. i updated because i thought it would semi cure my boredom but it didn*t so i*m gonna watch tv now. goodbye :]

i dare you to tell the truth. . .

Wed, 06 Jul 2005 00:14:58 GMT

sup. my fourth of july was alright i guess. i did nothing during the day except play pool. i bet it`s gonna get old real quick. later on, rach3L & cici came over & we went to buy fireworks. we came back here to pop them & judy robert & carlos showed up. we played pool, popped more fireworks then mike came and ran over our little firework thing? i dunno. i played my brother a little tournament to see who would get the parents room. omg it was so depressing. i made my last pocket but i hit it so hard that it went in and bounced back out. i wanted to cry. whatever he beat me & i went to sleep. i've been mad all day today. i was supposed to go run some errands but i forgot so now i have things to do tomorrow & that sucks. yeah i fought chingos with my bro & my mom so now she`s mad at me and that sucks because we`re alike & i`m not going to say sorry & neither will she. as for everything else, it kinda sucks. i haven`t talked to amanda in a few days so that`s akward. one of my best friends lied to me so that sucks too. i have no gas in my car so i can`t really go anywhere. yeah i better stop complaining because some people have it way worst & i feel like an idiot when i bitch about little things.

robert called this morning to say that he left a joint outside on one of the lamps. good job, buddy. can you imagine the trouble i would have been in if he hadn`t remembered & mom & dad would have seen it? oh yes, what a lovely thought :-\

i`m thinking more & more about senior year so i`m starting to get just a little freaked out. if family members would quit asking me what i wanna do for the rest of my life it wouln`t be so bad...but now i`m scared, nervous, anxious & happy all at the same time. i remember in middle school when we were referred to as "class of 2006" i thought "maaaaan...that`s too far away to even think about" & it`s pretty damn close. too close if you ask me. i`m hoping that next year is going to be the best :)

i`m a moron. i wish i had never said what i said because i have a feeling things are gonna be weird now & there`s no reason why they should be. i`m FINE with the concept of moving on & it`s gonna be pretty f*ckin stupid if i let something like that come in the way of a badass friendship that i wouldn`t wanna lose.

peace homies :)

" chill out, dude " " dude, you need to chill out "

Sun, 03 Jul 2005 17:20:41 GMT

hiiii* i'm super sleepy right now. i*m home alone so i thought i*d be able to sleep real badass but my parents & grandparents keep calling every 30 seconds so that idea got shot down. yesterday was....weird. in the afternoon i went to chik-fil-a with cici & amanda. they were laughing a lot & i didn*t understand some of the jokes. lol. then we went to hobby lobby and i bought a super cute little purse with a Flounder patch. all that talk about goodie bags and pillows made me excited for football season :]

so i came home & something happened with some pipe in our restroom so it was leaking all over the place so the bathroom was a mess, my mom, dad and brother were all helping out with it & i was here on the computer. i think they were mad at me but didn*t say anything. i was super happy when i found out we were going to rob*s because i feel so comfortable there. i*d choose there over any party any day. but yeeeah, things got weird. i had like a nervous breakdown & cried sooo much on my way over there. maybe i just needed a good cry? or maybe i was tired of things? i don*t know. i thought that i*d be cool once i got to rob*s but i wasn*t, i was kinda down until julian knew something was wrong for sure so he asked me about it and never left it alone & that*s when i had to get out of there. so i like ran to my car so i could go for a drive by myself & they followed me but i left anyway. i felt bad that they were worried about me because i would have been worried if one of my friends took off by themselves while they were crying like an idiot. annnyway, i threw a cruise to who knows where. i was like going toward mission when i decided to turn back because i didn*t wanna waste so much gas, lol. yeah so i headed back to rob*s but took this weird road and i thought my tire blew out but it was just people popping fireworks. by that time i was calm so i went back & talked to amanda & judy for a bit. i tried to bother julian & robert but they were sharing secrets like bitches so i smoked some blacks & walked around the huge yard. i played pool with julian. i think i beat him once :) & the other game was suuuper close, so i'm getting better. yaaay the pool table comes in today. ok anyway, the girls left to some party but i wasn*t up for it so i stayed with the guys and then ciiiiciii showed up :D i'm glad she was there because we were just cracking up for anything & everything. i had soooo many laughs. i laughed more in 1 hour than i probably have all summer. julian reenacting girls in horror movies who can't find their keys was hilarious.
- the chinese hornet
- cici: " ugh stop fuckin' saying chill out. erase it from your vocabulary"
julian: " maaaan.......relax"
- taco bell chuh-loo-puhs
- "hey dawg, hand me that pellow"
- wtf is a pellow?
- "dude a wasp stung me in the back of my head"
- how is it possible that in a room full of pot smokers, no one has a lighter or matches that work? that tripped me out.

pos yeah those were the highlights. the girls got back, i played another game of pool then had to leave. jason & lorissa went! yaaay i hadn*t seen them in forever. i miss jason. so i had to leave too early & that was gay. i came home & rach3L came over to talk about random things. i hate the word random. after she left, i made a phone call, got pist off then went to sleep. lol mando calls at 4:00 a.m. saying "what are you doing saraCpimp?" lol i was asleep but it was funny. yeah that*s about it. i*m kinda hungry & i have money to go eat but i think i*m gonna save that & give my bro 20 bucks to give me my parents room for the full 10 days that they*re gone. that*s dick that he*s charging me, right?

i*m soooo tired of all this bullshit. it*s been way too fucking long. i mean i*m not saying that i lay up at night crying & shit, because i don*t. i just get frustrated & i hate being mad. i don*t like being like that because i take it out on my friends sometimes, i get in this bitchy mood & it makes me sad to be like that but it*s something i can*t control. julian was gonna do something super sweet for me yesterday, or so he said he was, and that made me very happy...but it wouldn*t have helped. ooooh well, we*ll see how much more of this bullshit i can take, things will get better...they have to get better because i know i*m better than to let things like that bring me down. ugh, i*m kinda disappointed in a friend of mine. maybe it hasn't occured to her that what she did kinda hurt me...but i would never do that to any of my friends, because that shit sucks man. i*m mad. maybe if i had stayed at rob*s just a liiittle bit longer, i would have been able to have the present jason had for me :(

woo- long entry. i*m sure most of you just skimmed through it because that*s what i do when entries are too long. bye loves <3

Sat, 02 Jul 2005 06:51:21 GMT

hi. i'm not in the greatest of moods right now. i have a lot of things on my mind. 2 of my friends are going through a really rough time i'm sure, so please keep them in your prayers. .
not so much has been going on with me lately. things have been boring. yesterday i woke nathan's lazy ass up & drove my brother to mcallen. & that was about it. today i didn't do much either. i went to run some errands, then went to benny's to play poker. he made me some badass pizza so i ate & cici showed up & told a funny story then we left & went to amanda's house. we watched degrassi & cici & i laughed forever at that girl & her fucked up facial expressions with teeth? yeah. then i came home & just laid in bed & listened to my music. amanda called and said that she & rach3L were coming over, so they did and we talked to my brother & his friends. we tried to reminisce but i wasn't in the thinking mood. after things got a little too boring, we decided to take a walk to the canal so we did that but i didn't enjoy it, because like i said, i don't feel all that great. i don't even know why i'm updating. bye.

fill it out because i know you guys are bored :D

Thu, 30 Jun 2005 20:18:50 GMT

these past couple of days have been filled with painting. that's about all i have to say. goodbye <3

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. How have I affected you?

5. What do you think of me?

6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?

7. How long do you think we will be friends?

8. Do you love me?

9. Do you have a crush on me?

10. Would you kiss me?

11. Would you hug me?

12. Physically, what stands out about me?

13. Emotionally, what stands out about me?

14. Do you wish I was cooler?

15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?

16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

17. Am I loveable?

18. How long have you known me?

19. Describe me in one word.

20. What was your first impression?

21. Do you still think that way about me now?

22. What do you think my weakness is?

23. Do you think I'll get married?

24. What makes me happy?

25. What makes me sad?

26. What reminds you of me?

27. If you could give me anything what would it be?

28. How well do you know me?

29. When's the last time you saw me?

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

31. Do you think I could kill someone?

32. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

Mon, 27 Jun 2005 19:20:46 GMT

yesterday was fun :] i heard that my bestest friend wasn't feeling well so i took her to the mall. she's in the Hot Topic computer now ;] yes i drove on the expressway again and i was oh-so excited. after we shoppped around a little we ate some chinese and then went to Flip-Side. i was there FOREVER just staring at all the junk because i'm a moron. we forgot to go to free spirits [ stupid, stupid ] i'm hitting myself on the forehead. then we went to payless, target and sally's and came home. we watched about a million hours of degrassi so that was cool. that show's so dumb but so entertaining. after i was all degrassied-out, i went to drop off amanda and stopped by nathan's to give him his present that i made him :] i don't think he liked it, but whatever. i bought dion's cd, then came home and crashed out. & today i've been busy so far. i helped my dad sweep the room some more, then he sent me to wal-mart to buy a mop and broom. so i went and after that i went by school to pick up my hours and julie was there :] yuuup, now i'm here. i have to go to the Boys & Girls club in a little bit so i'm out. bye loves HAVE YOU EVER:
1. Kissed your cousin: no i don't think so
2. Ran away: no, never wanted to either
3. Pictured your crush naked: lol no
4. Skipped class: psh. what a stupid question. of course
5. Broken someone's heart: i might have
6. Been in love: no not yet
7. Cried when someone died: i don't know anyone who has died
8. Wanted someone: yes
9. Broken a bone: i fractured my wrist
10. Done something embarrassing: all the time
11. Done a drug: no
12. Cried in school: it's been FOREVER, but yes

WHICH IS BETTER:

13. Coke or Pepsi: peKsi
14. Sprite or 7UP: sprite
15. Girls or Guys: we're all fabulous :D
16. Flowers or Candy: flowers
17. Scruff or Clean shaved: Scruff :)
18. Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes
19. Bitchy or Slutty: bitchy people are cool, as long as they're not bitchy with me
20. Tall or Short: tall
21. Pants or Shorts: pants
22. Night or Day: night ;]

FAVORITES:

29. Color: black & hot pink
30. Movie: i have a lot.
31. Artist: i'm not a big fan of art
32. Cars: 1971 chevelle SS
33. Ice cream: strawberry cheesecake
34. Season: winter
35. Breakfast Food: sausage biscuit with hashbrowns for a dollar :)

WHO:

36. Makes you laugh the most: rach3L & david g.
37. Makes you smile: my friends
38. Can make you feel better? amanda & julian
39. Has a Crush on you: psh, who DOESN'T have a crush on me? lol just joking people
40. Do you have a crush on someone: yeah i guess, but it's not by choice
41. Who has it easier? guys, definately
42. Gives you a funny feeling when you see them: certain people
DO YOU EVER:

43. Sit by the phone waiting for a phone call all night: nah i have better things to do
44. Save AiM conversations: no
45. Save E-mails: no
46. Forward secret E-mails: no
47. Wish you were someone else: no
48. Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: occasionally
49. Wear perfume or cologne: yes, i'm running out
52. Go online for longer than eight hours at a time: i think i've done it before
HAVE YOU EVER:

53. Fallen for your best friend: yeah, robert & julian...but not anymore
54. Made out with JUST a friend: yeah
55. Kissed two people in the same day: no, that would be weird.
56. Been rejected: um...yeah i think so
57. Been in love: no
58. Used someone: not exactly
59. Been used: i'm pretty sure
60. Cheated on someone: is it cheating if you're not "together"?
61. Been cheated on: yes
62. Been kissed: yes
63. Done something you regret: yes
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON:

64. You touched: my brother
65. You talked to: my dad
66. You hugged: my brother
67. You instant messaged: julian
68. You kissed: :X
69. You yelled at: nathan
70. You thought about: ruben cantu for some reason
71. Who text messaged you: cici, like on saturday
72. Who broke your heart: nathan. gosh i always get asked that damn question
73. Who told you they loved you: my momma :)

settle down, spunky ;D - smiley

Sun, 26 Jun 2005 04:20:24 GMT

soooo... not much has been going on in my life at all. my internet is finally back after 3 days. i was going crazy. it turns out my genius of a brother had the line connected into the wrong little thingamajig. but whatever. i really haven't done anything this week. i had to go my community service at school and that's about it. i finally got to see julian :] he went to visit me but he's a little bitch so he and wally left after 5 minutes. i was soooo bored all that week. i made everyone pictures though :] after that i went to the annex building to get all my pan am junk straightened out. i saw camarada skootr, i didn't know he worked there. anywho, i talked to the guy there for like an hour and he was very helpful. i think after that i came home and i've just been laaaazy. more than ever before. my mother & i went shopping and i bought a super cute little change purse and i loved it because it was pink with glittery white stars, i got home and it was broken >:o the world hates me so stuff like that always has to happen. and i also bought the new As I Lay Dying cd so that made my day :] the spurs won so that made my day again :] i was forced to serve hours at the Boys & Girls club and it was sooo boring. everyone that's there is in like 6th grade or under. so i spent some time at my mom's office right next door. i got to play in some lady's office and use the computer in junk. then rach3L went to visit me and we cruised around for a bit and talked. then we went inside and chatted with Smiley about our friend and all of her diseases. lmao that was funny. after rach3L had to leave, i left and came home. i made up some hours yesterday also. we had a pool tournament and Smiley & I took first place. undefeated 5-0 champs baby ;D all the little kids were like "whooooa, you got beat by a girl" it was funny. i haven't been in the mood to do much lately. going out isn't really fun for me anymore, i don't know why that is. i spend last night watching S&TC re-runs. today i went to the mall by myself. first i met cici at circle K and that puta had me waiting for like 15 minutes. i drove on the expressway!! yes i know you all are so very proud of me. i've had my license and car for more than a year and had never been on it. and i figured since i was by myself i had nothing to lose, so i drove on it and i did great :) i got to the mall & spend FOREVER looking for a parking spot. some damn lady from reynose took 5 minutes to get her ONE kid in the car and leave. she saw me waiting for her space and i'm sure she was slow on purpose. bitch. lol that reminds me. when my mom & i were at the mall together the other day, i was holding the door open for my mom but she was taking forever cuz she needed to throw something away and this lady walks through the door that i was holding and didn't even say thank you. and my mom and i looked at each other and said "bitch" at the exact same time. it was funny. annywho, i bought a cute shirt that i need to exchange :-\ then i went to mervyn's, then to chik-fil-a and i came home. yes, what a loser, going to all those places by myself. it's all good. my aunt, uncle and cousin came to visit :) i love them they're so funny, i especially love my aunt when she's drunk because she spills secrets and it's too funny. now they're gone and i'm bored. i wasn't up for the party tonight. like i said, i haven't been in the mood. maybe i'll grow out of this little slump i'm in.

my car is scaring me :( i need to get it fixed. the room is almost done, yaaaay :D it just needs to be textured and painted and the pool table comes in on tuesday and that's about it. i'm excited. my brother said we're gonna be having chingos of get2gethers soon. i don't know about that :-\ i don't like people at my house. haha i'm mean but it's true. i have a feeling i'm gonna throw down one day when some drunk chick comes in to try and use my restroom. ooookeydowkey, i think i've typed enough. i miss my friends :( kinda sorta. take cares, guys :D

italian ice

Wed, 22 Jun 2005 04:15:40 GMT

hi guys :) these past couple of days have been not so interesting. fathers' day was good though. my dad liked his gifts and i was nice to him all day. yesterday was the first day of my community service and it was so hard getting up at 7:20. it wasn't so bad though because claree went and we just talked the whole two hours. after that i went to nathan's to pick up my birthday present and we watched the notebook :) such a gay movie but i love it. then i went to my algebra class and got my test back, it was a 69 :( i was so sad. so i dropped the class. i know i drop a lot of classes but i just can't risk it. so that's done with. & well today kinda sucked. i had to go to school early again and it was sooo boring. i spent FOREVER doodling "seNioRs 'O6" on typing paper with sharpies. and i found like 1000 new ways to write my name. whatever, i came home and took a niiiice nap :) then i went to pan am to get my drop finalized and came home to sweep the game room. i've never sweated so much in my life. it was disgusting because there's no aircon and it was just super gross. i showered, watched S&TC, some of the new real world austin [ i really wanted to see the whole thing ], then went to victor's bro's for the game. it was good to see rach3L again! she bought me THE coolest lighter ever from chicago. i <3 it. so claree & jason were there and while the boys watched the game we 4 sat in a little circle and talked about stuff. it had been a very long while since we did that and it was nice :) no major bonding, but it was progress. so after victor tackled rach3L, it was time to leave and now i'm here. the seether/crossfade concert was tonight. i wanted to go. it was because of my stupidity that i'm not there, so it's ok. alright well i guess i'm done for now. i'm sad because the spurs lost. i think i jinxed them by wearing my shirt. oh well. bye loves <3

benjina has the best water ever ;D

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 05:16:28 GMT

hi friends :) my 12 o clock curfew always seems to put a damper on things so i'm going to update. let's see, i had a big test in algebra yesterday and hopefully i passed because if i didn't, i'll cry. after the test i went to the mall with Mom and Dora & i bought some cute shirts and jeans. after that we came home, i chilled, then got ready. after that i went to manda's to pick her up. she drove for a while and i was so proud of her. anyway, i had to vomit so we went back to her house and i threw up and felt like shit. then we went to nathan's and he hooked it up with some pepto, then went to solis's. it was good to see everyone again :) blah i came home and crashed out. today sucked, it really did. i got yelled at a lot because i'm "selfish" and i "never think of anyone but myself". whatever, i had to make 3 trips to Mccoy's to get junk for the game room and it suuucked. i was so lost in that damn store. i think by the third time the cashier lady was tired of me. i went to go buy some comida and i cried all the way to el pato. then i stopped feeling sorry for myself, ate my food and then went with Claire to my aunt's house to get extention cords? blah, then skootr called and i decided to go ahead and go to the show so i got ready and amanda and i saled. i hadn't seen lori dre lauren & skootr in forever & a day so that was cool. and i swear that singer gets hotter every time i go to watch. so solarium kicked ass as usual, we cruised around for a bit looking for somewhere to go then ended up at cici's. she's camara. i looked at her yearbook, laughed at Mo's mushroom cut and now i'm here. i'm very bored so i think i'm gonna go find something on tv. peace homie g. dawg.